The News Ltd organisation was reeling today from revelations that ace reporter Glenn Milne had visited a ‘biff club’ in the company of other journalists while drunk.
‘Biff Clubs’ are well-known late night venues where journalists can go and punch people who annoy them, for a fee.
Milne apparently visited ‘Walkleys’ , a popular ‘biff’ venue, paying an unspecified amount of money to have an encounter with a popular podium performer known only as ‘Stephen’.
After Milne attempted to break the ‘no touching’ rule, he was asked to leave.
The revelations come just days after it came to light that Foreign Minister Alexander Downer had himself visited a ‘slip club’ and was asked to leave.
‘Slip clubs’ are venues where politicians go to make appalling political errors of judgment while performing ‘poll dancing’, in a desperate attempt to stimulate interest in a jaded electorate.
Mr Downer, who currently works under the name ‘Babette’ in a French maid costume at Goldfingers, is said to be one of the ‘slip club’s’ most frequent customers, and regularly enjoys sabotaging his own party’s electoral profile with dumb sophomoric political pranks.
Milne’s visit to the ‘biff club’ has been dismissed by News Ltd executives, who say that his credibility in writing moralising political articles will in no way be compromised by appearing like a drunken tool on national television.
Genuine journalists working at News Ltd were not available for comment today as they were living in a hole to hide their deep embarrassment.
The vast majority of the Australian electorate who’ve been to a bucks or hens night at some point were too busy laughing to offer a statement.
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