Crikey Worm: cops caught faking more than 250,000 breath tests

Good morning, early birds. An internal investigation reveals Victorian police have faked a huge number of drivers' breath tests. Plus, another live export video causing controversy. It's the news you need to know, with Chris Woods.

BLOWHARD COPS

Victorian police officers faked more than 250,000 roadside breath tests over a five-and-a-half year period, an internal investigations has revealed.

The Age reports that roughly 258,000 alcohol breath tests, or about 1.5% of the total 17.7 million tests, were falsified over the time period out of a combination of police apathy and need to meet targets. Victoria Police were tipped off late last year from unusually quick breathalysing data and believes officers, in what the agency’s new head of Professional Standards Command has labelled a breach of community trust, may have circumvented the system by blowing into breathalysers themselves.

THE LATEST FROM LIVE EXPORTS

Australian cattle have been shown arriving in Israel while covered in faeces, in the latest footage of the live export industry leaked by activists.

The Adelaide Advertiser ($) reports that the group Israel Against Live Shipments recorded cattle loaded onto the controversial live export ship Bader III from Adelaide and Fremantle, then entering Eilat covered in faeces and enduring a 44-degree heatwave. The Federal Agriculture Department spokesperson has since rejected the group’s claims of mistreatment, saying “the footage does not reflect the conditions of the cattle throughout the journey” and that the animals were washed down every second day.

REPORTS OF DEATH GREATLY EXAGGERATED

A dissident Russian journalist reported to have been killed in Kiev has shockingly turned up in the middle of a Ukrainian state service news conference addressing his killing.

According to the The Sydney Morning Herald, Ukrainian officials reported on Tuesday that Arkady Babchenko, a 41-year-old critic of Russian President Vladimir Putin and policy in Ukraine and Syria, had been murdered in his apartment — a claim that sparked fresh hostility between Ukraine and Russia. However on Wednesday, Babchenko appeared alive, if on the brink of tears, before reporters to claim that he had been part of a Ukrainian secret services operation required to stop a Russian attempt on his life.

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THEY REALLY SAID THAT?

While all pharmaceutical treatments have side effects, racism is not a known side effect of any Sanofi medication.

Sanofi spokesperson

The makers of Ambien knock back Roseanne Barr’s suggestion that their drug has anything to do with her wildly racist, career-ending tweets.

CRIKEY QUICKIE: THE BEST OF YESTERDAY

#MeToo insurance? Protection offered for accused Australian musiciansSophie Benjamin

“Sydney musician Brendan Sloan recently received a renewal notice for his musical instrument policy with Marsh Advantage Insurance. At the bottom of the covering letter, Marsh advised him that he could add additional cover to his policy, as below: ‘Additional & Optional Cover – Sexual Molestation Defence Endorsement: We are now able to provide an endorsement to include cover towards the Legal Fees and Defence costs that may be incurred in the event of an allegation of sexual molestation made against you.’”

As the subpoenas fly, we resume playing our favourite game: ‘Where’s Michaelia?’Bernard Keane

“Employment Minister Michaelia Cash was rostered on to appear at Senate estimates this morning. She appeared yesterday at hearings of the Education and Employment Committee, no problem. She was in Parliament House. But, strangely, she didn’t show up when the committee convened at 9am in committee room 2S3.”

‘No freedom until women are truly free’: Irish immigrants continue abortion fight in AustraliaEden Faithfull

“The past week has been an eventful one for reproductive rights. In a landslide referendum, Ireland voted to lift the eighth amendment to the constitution, which effectively banned abortions. This was helped in part by the #HomeToVote movement, where Irish expatriates who were not given the opportunity to submit a postal vote flew home to have their voices heard. Back in NSW, the Upper House held a conscience vote to install 150-metre ‘safe access zones’ for women attending clinics that offer abortions.”

READ ALL ABOUT IT

One Nation MP Brian Burston deserts Hanson to back company tax cut ($)

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NT school has been closed for almost two weeks after it was placed under a curse ($)

‘Lonely’ former Labor Senator Joe Bullock switches from red to blue

Irrigators say South Australia’s desalination plant could pump 50GL into the Murray ($)

Wilson Security to refund $740,000 to WA customers for bogus security patrols

Mars bars fossil fuels and goes 100pc renewables

Doug Cameron, Jim Molan clash over ‘flag-wrapping nonsense’ ($)

Freeze on Carl Wulff properties eyed as ex-Ipswich CEO faces corruption charges ($)

The shocking truth about the Hurricane Maria death toll is our Trump nightmare made real

WHAT’S ON TODAY

Canberra

Day three of the latest round of federal Senate estimates will hear from portfolio representatives for Community Affairs (Dept of Social Services, covering family tax benefit, child payments and income support); Industry, Innovation and Science (Dept of Industry, Innovation and Science Australia, Anti-Dumping Commission, Australia’s Chief Scientist, ANSTO, CSIRO and IP Australia); Foreign Affairs and Trade (Dept of Foreign Affairs and Trade, covering trade operations, tourism, New Colombo Plan, payments to international organisations, and consular and passport services); and Education and Employment (Dept of Department of Education and Training covering Gonski 2.0 and schools funding).

Melbourne

Banking royal commission will hear from Australian Banking Association CEO Anna Bligh, after examining a case study involving a National Australia Bank business customer.
Victorian budget estimates will hear from Industry and Employment Minister Ben Carroll and Families and Children, Youth Affairs and Early Childhood Education Minister Jenny Mikakos.
Daniel Morcombe Foundation CEO Holly Brennan will speak at the Positive Schools Conference about the role schools, parents and carers play in preventing the abuse of children both online and offline.
The Victorian Equal Opportunity and Human Rights Commissioner will seek leave to intervene in proceedings relating to the controversial approval of the Metropolitan Fire and Emergency Services Board and United Firefighters Union Operational Agreement 2016 at the Fair Work Commission.

Brisbane

A protest vigil will be held outside Peter Dutton’s electoral office for Salim Kyawning, the 52-year-old Rohingya refugee who died on Manus Island last week. Speakers will include head of the Queensland Rohingya community Noor Zaman, former Greens senator Larissa Waters and Mufti Junaid Akbar.
The Threatened Species Recovery Hub of the National Environmental Science Program will host a roadshow and workshop, featuring scientific, animal and political experts from across Australia.

Sydney

The Australian National Maritime Museum will host a chartered cruise to explore Vivid Sydney celebrations and new, interactive light sculptures at Taronga Zoo.
ASX will host a “Meet the Manager” 2018 series event, set to explore sectors ranging from emerging markets, Australian and Asian property, and technology.
Lendlease will host “How Will You Live Your Hundred Year Life?”, an event exploring how elongated lifespans redefine how people live and work.

Adelaide

The SA History Festival will host their closing ceremony complete with Historian of the Year Awards.
JR Education Consulting Services will host The New National Quality Standard Conference, an Australian conference that has run since February and features educational experts discussing new quality standards.

Hobart

The Federal Department of Environment and Energy will hold public forum to gain insights that will inform the review of the Product Stewardship Act 2011, which deals with product stewardship and waste.

Australia

Today is National Soup Day, with Heinz celebrating by selling soup in Melbourne’s Federation Square and donating proceeds to the charity Youth Projects.

International

Today is World No Tobacco Day, with a Quit Victoria and Stroke Foundation event planned to discuss the long-term effects of smoking and strokes in Melbourne.

THE COMMENTARIAT

‘Profoundly irresponsible’: How the NDIS is failing the autistic — Madeleine Ryan (Sydney Morning Herald): “I am autistic and much of the terminology that’s used to describe autism often feels confusing, and disempowering. Although the subject is frequently in the news and being talked about the diagnostics coined by doctors, professors and scientists in relation to it are often disconnected from my life, and the lives of autistic adults and children. All the puzzling terms, labels and categories can make it harder for us to receive help when we need it and harder for the rest of the world to understand us.”

Commercial TV’s rare leadership on Roseanne is a breath of fresh air — Liz Giuffre (The Conversation): “Roseanne has described her ‘bad joke’ as being ‘in poor taste’. However, there is more to consider than ‘bad’ and ‘taste’ here. In fact, it was not actually a joke at all. Rather, it was a power exchange designed to directly belittle, marginalise and insult based on race. Racism causes actual harm.”