On Feathertop Mountain
(to be sung as a Tom Waits dirge)

He must have thought it, well, ironic
The Minister for iconic
Attractions and state water
That perhaps he shouldn’t oughta
Die upon a mountain rough
Midst megalitres of the stuff

So acting like a trooper
This cold and lonely grouper
Made the presser of his life
For the choppers flying by

Did he think of life incomplete, the
cause unwon, the strife, his wife?
No his thoughts turned bitter, sweeter
To a gal named Margarita
Tim Holding dreamed of pizza pie

Pizza pie
Pizza pie
As he lay down to die
He was dreaming pizza pie

Patrick Henry pondered death, liberty
MLK of one day being free
But when a flak ex-of-Unity
Has the slightest opportunity
It’s not Jerusalem he will espy
Is that orb, red, greasy, gleaming
The face of Senator David Feeney
Hanging in the midst of his mind’s eye?

No as eternity comes closer
It’s a large capricciosa
Thus swoon the DLP when they’re about to die

While others think of lovers
Causes, triumphs, children, mothers
For the right it’s all about the pizza pie

Pizza pie pizza pie
It’s all about the pizza pie
Let us bless the
Holy puttanesca
Thinking only
Of a large quattro stagoni
It’s all about the pizza pie